What smells?

I’m sure what I am about to tell you will go down in the history books of motherhood. There are dandies and then… there is this gem. A little girl, full of fun, sass, and inventive creativity all balled up in some terrible 4-year-old cuteness. Ya! I am gonna brag about “little me”, cause I can and cause it’s true. 🙂

My mom had gone over me with a fine-tooth comb looking for what “smelled” on me. She told my dad I smelled rotten. I was potty trained and there was no issue with anything in that department.

Into the bathtub, I went. Scrub, scrub, rinse, lather, and repeat. Each time she would take me out, dry me, and do the sniff test. “Oh for heaven’s sake, where is that smell coming from?” my mother declared. My dad was equally dumbfounded and before he got wrangled into tub assisting, he headed out the door.

I had suffered 3 baths by the end of the afternoon and I was not particularly happy about this. Exhausted my mom dressed me and set me on the footstool, and took the flashlight out, and called my dad. You’re getting warmer Ruth.

Open up and say ah!

I can still see the green carpet, the mustard footstool, and the old recliner all assembled in the living room. They were all there as witnesses to the inspection. Stuff and stoggy they sat silent as I was prepared for the exam. The light from the afternoon sun was shining in the big window and I was curious as to what this next event would turn up.

My dad was given instruction to “HOLD THE LIGHT” and my mom began her inspection of my ears. Yanking and pulling she looked into my ears, then the back of my ears. Gave my ears a sniff test, and then cleaned them out with Q-Tips. Well, it wasn’t my ears that smelled. Warmer Ruth.

Next came my mouth. Open wide Michele. Ah! With a popsicle stick, she poked, prodded and sniffed. Nope! Teeth, gums, and throat all looked good. Mom didn’t know it yet, but she was almost on fire!

Jackpot!

Narrowing her eyes and commanding my dad to shine the light on my nose she tipped my head back and gave me a sniff. SNIFF! Silence. Then her eyes got as big as saucers. The smell! The rotten smell was coming from my nose. Just to be sure she gave me one more sniff test and then told my dad to give me a sniff too. SNIFF! “Yep, that’s it!” said dad.

Now they were both really into this investigation of what was in my nose smelling so bad. Like a flash, my mom was off to the bathroom to get a bulb syringe, and tweezers. I could hear her move into the kitchen and in minutes she appeared with her “surgery items”.

This grouping looked like torture lay ahead. I began a protest to which my dad, taking his steel arms, encircled my little body and arms, held me tight in his lap.

Oh for heaven’s sake. Michele!

Now that I was sufficiently subdued my mom began her further exploration. Picking up the flashlight and the tweezers she slowly made her way close to my face. I flinched and thrashed my head, so mom instructed day to loosen an arm from around me and clamp my head back.

Fully restrained she worked fast and began to pull from my nose, rolled up pieces of rotten, stinky, snotty …. KLEENEX! “Oh for heaven’s sake! Michele! What possessed you to do this?” said my mom.

One by one she pulled from my nose 16 wadded up Kleenex balls from within the cavity of my nose. I can still see the little pie tin full of the Kleenex balls. White Kleenex now green, smelling like mold and rot.

Next came the warm water rinse in my nose. Spitting and sputtering she encouraged me to blow it back out my nose. We did this several times till she was sure nothing should be in there. I was about finished with this exam and was ready to go swing!

Isn’t that something

I am sure you are darn curious about how those Kleenex got into my nose. Well… my mom had left me to nap one day. My naps were taken in my room upstairs. In my room was a kleenex box. I wasn’t so tired, so I thought I would have some fun with Kleenex.

The fun was taking them out of the box one at a time till I had emptied the box. Then once the box was empty I had to figure out something else. Hmm? Why not rip them into strips, ball them up and shove them up my nose? I kept packing them in without much trouble.

Once the nap was over my mom discovered the Kleenex box was empty and assumed I just pulled them all out. HA! Think again, Ruthie! She should have counted just like they do in the operating room!

I can’t be the only one who did some crazy stuff. I bet you could tell a few stories too! Until next time friends, here is too good food, good friends and some crazy fun-filled childhood adventures!

Michele

2 thoughts on “What smells?

  1. BettieG says:

    Oh, Michele, that is such a funny story! Kids are so “creative” sometimes!! My husband played the classic, “one for you, two for me,” with his little brother and the children’s vitamins. When those were gone, they moved onto the baby aspirin and the alka seltzer, before his Mom finally found them! Needless to say, they found out what it was like to get their stomachs pumped!

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