vote chronic pain

Voting With Chronic Pain

Dear friends;

Greetings from my recliner and a heating pad!

Did you get to vote in the elections this week? My husband and I managed to get out and vote yesterday in spite of knowing that the lines would be long. And indeed, they were. When we arrived we saw a line that extended outside and through the filled parking lot. We figured as much since there were cars lining the streets as we approached. We decided to park in the school parking lot across the street and walk over.

As we walked onto the campus where the voting was taking place we were reminded of two years ago when the lines extended as far for the presidential election. Wow! It’s surprising, no not really with the political atmosphere we have been in for two years, but midterm elections are usually not that big of a deal. Continue reading

Writer/Speaker sharing about how to make it through anything. I married a pastor with two boys who just lost their mom, I homeschooled my own children, led children’s ministries and women’s ministries in the church, and founded and led a homeschool support group. Had to give up much of this due to chronic pain. Like the Insurance, I know a lot because I’ve seen a lot.

how to help

How Can You Help Someone With Chronic Pain?

Dear Friend,

The other day, when you heard about my diagnosis of Fibromyalgia, you said to let you know if there was any way you could help. I thought I might write to let you know how you can help. I know that you mean well, but this kind of offer kind of puts me in a quandary.

You see, I am not really sure how to answer that. There might be something that I know you would do and I would ask you but there are so many needs and I really feel like I am imposing to ask for your help. Unless you are a really, really good friend, I probably will never call on you for help even though I know your offer is sincere.

Put some thought into it

It’s like at Christmas or my birthday, I would really rather you listen to my conversations and watch my life and see where the needs are. Then make a specific offer, such as, calling up and saying, “Hey, I’m at the store can I pick anything up for you?” Or maybe offer to give me a ride to the doctor or therapy session.

I Get So Lonely

These things are so helpful. Plus they give us some time to visit. This is really nice because one of the biggest issues I have is that I get so very lonely. I seldom get out of the house except to go to the doctor. I don’t get to go to my regular activities anymore and none of my friends drop by for a visit.

Hey, you know what would be really nice is if you would just choose a specific day of the week that you would come by. It might be just to visit or to bring food or watch a movie. I would be looking forward to that every week. (Kinda like that move Tuesdays with Morrie.)

There Are So Many Ways to Help

Well, there are many, many things that you can do to help. A friend of mine gave me this list. It’s really a good list of ideas of ways someone can help the chronically ill. Maybe it will be helpful for you, so I’m going to make it available is a free download.

Thanks for loving and caring about me. It means so much to me.

See you Tuesday!  😉

Mandy Farmer


Here’s the list to the downloadable page – Just click Below

CLICK HERE >>>>>>> Ways You Can Help the Chronically Sick.



Writer/Speaker sharing about how to make it through anything. I married a pastor with two boys who just lost their mom, I homeschooled my own children, led children’s ministries and women’s ministries in the church, and founded and led a homeschool support group. Had to give up much of this due to chronic pain. Like the Insurance, I know a lot because I’ve seen a lot.

Book Review

What I Learned from The Pain Companion

I was given this book, The Pain Companion, as a gift. In return, I am writing this review. I am not otherwise being paid and the thoughts on this post our my own.

Some links in this post are affiliate links, meaning, at no additional cost to you, we will earn a commission if you click through and make a purchase. 

What if there was no pain.

For some of us that would be like heaven. But really? Do we want there to truly be no pain? We might want to rethink that. What if you touched something hot but felt no pain. What if you kept pushing yourself to work, run, play without feeling pain? Not exactly a good thing, right? Continue reading

Mandy Farmer writer/speaker desires to support you in whatever storm you a facing. She has “Been there done that”. Like the Farmer’s Insurance, “We know a lot because we’ve seen a lot”. Mandy married a widowed pastor with two pre-teen boys. She became their mom and then they added another son and daughter to the mix. A 21st Century kind of family. Mandy served as children’s minister for 25 years followed by serving as women’s minister for 5plus years. In 2011, Chronic Pain became her constant companion which led to job loss for both her and her husband. Then this led to home loss and financial loss. But God is faithful and has brought them through these storms. Mandy would like to come alongside you to encourage you, help you, uphold you. Deut. 31:6

How I Managed Fibromyalgia and Survived my Daughter’s Wedding

Dear Friend;

You asked me recently how I am doing after my daughter’s wedding. It took me until now (about 6 weeks) to recover but it was worth it! It was the most beautiful day and I was able to be right there and most importantly, not in pain! I shared about the wedding on my personal family page The Farmers Place. [Just in case you are curious. 🙂 ]

My daughter and I before wedding

To be honest, I was really concerned that I would be in a lot of pain by the wedding day. I asked all my chronic pain friends for their suggestions and took as many as I could into consideration.  One thing I know, whether a person has a chronic illness or not, is that a wedding can quickly get out of hand. My strongest advice to anyone planning a wedding is to


So here are a few things that I did:

Continue reading

Writer/Speaker sharing about how to make it through anything. I married a pastor with two boys who just lost their mom, I homeschooled my own children, led children’s ministries and women’s ministries in the church, and founded and led a homeschool support group. Had to give up much of this due to chronic pain. Like the Insurance, I know a lot because I’ve seen a lot.

Fibro Friend ~ How Are Your Finances Holding Out?

Colleen Sullivan

photo credit Pixabay modified by Mandy

Are your Finances holding out?

This is a question that most friends and family never think to ask, “How are your finances?” It’s a little personal and maybe that is why no one asks but the truth is that sickness can take a big toll on anyone’s finances no matter how much insurance you have. Not only does the patient lose work time but also the spouse or caregiver. I am told that sickness is the number one reason people file for bankruptcy. (See this article at CNBC)

My friend, Colleen Sullivan knows about the challenges in finance due to her own journey with fibromyalgia. I met Colleen through the Christian Chronic Illness Network. She has offered to share her struggles with staying afloat and the lessons learned. Follow the link below to read her letter to friends.

Continue reading

Letters to Friends ~ How Are You Doing Since Your Diagnosis?

letters to friends Kate

Photo Credit: Virin at Pixabay Modified by Mandy



It’s time for another Letter to Friends! Right after diagnosis, is probably the best time to share with your friends about fibromyalgia and how it affects you. Mainly because our world is so fast-paced, people will quickly forget that you have a health issue at all, especially when it comes to fibro and chronic pain. When we are seen in public, most people see a healthy person and never think twice about it. Others may ask how you are doing.

I recently came in contact with Kate Straus through chronic illness communities. She worked in the education field for over ten years before fibr0myalgia changed her life’s path. With a background in special education and early childhood intervention, she has compiled a toolbox of skills to help those with differences navigate life to make them the best that they can be.

Photo provided by Kate Straus

Kate has learned, herself, that while fibromyalgia can be an obstacle, it has also revealed strengths that she did not know she had. She is easy to work with, listens well, and is compassionate. She is now a certified fibromyalgia coach helping those with fibromyalgia adjust to their new life.

Today, she has offered a letter that she wrote previously to friends and family to help them understand the struggles she faces with fibromyalgia. I invite you to continue reading to understand more fully challenges we, as fibro warriors, face.

Continue reading

Fibromyalgia ~ Physical Therapy & Exercise

Sarahs Letter to Friends

This week’s guest is Sarah from the blog, The Last Days of Pompeii. She’ll be sharing about physical therapy and exercise. She just started her own blog to help awareness of Fibromyalgia, MCS, and Rheumatoid Arthritis. She has found like many of us with a chronic illness that the chronic illness blogging community is so uplifting and encouraging. That is how we recently met, through Chronic Illness bloggers

She lives in Northern Indiana and works online because of Fibromyalgia and MCS. She has suffered from Fibromyalgia all of her life and with MCS and Rheumatoid Arthritis for the last 10 years or so.

Before becoming ill, she was a university professor teaching several courses online, but can no longer concentrate well enough to continue. She has no regrets – just moving her talents into other channels, like blogging.

Continue on to read her letter to explain how physical therapy and exercise are a part of her fibro life. Continue reading

What is Fibro Fog? Why are you Crashing?

What is Fibro Fog


There’s is nothing more frustrating to me than fibro fog. My mind just won’t think straight and it seems to just come on for no reason at all. I start switching up my homonyms and forgetting the most common words. My friend, Nan Jones wrote a letter about this for me to share with you today.

I met Nan when I was doing a series for those in the ministry. Nan offered to write a guest post about discovering the Presence of God in their darkest hour that time, but in getting to know here I found we had more in common than ministry. She also suffers from fibromyalgia and other chronic issues. Nan’s words are always so beautiful and I really love it when she writes a prayer. She wrote a wonderful book, The Perils of a Pastor’s Wife. And boy, has she had them. If you have ever been hurt by the church, get your hands on this book.

Presently, on her blog, she is featuring women who have been through the fire and survived. Some very inspiring stories. She even interviewed me! Today, on my blog, she writes about the challenges of brain fog, fatigue, and The Crash. Continue reading and learn more.

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from Winslow

Letters to Friends ~ Why Are You So Tired?

Just beyond the pain of fibromyalgia, fatigue is probably the biggest deterrent to life for the fibro warrior. This is not a good tired such as, after a hard day of working in the garden or boating at the lake. This tired stays with you. It’s there almost every morning when you rise, whether or not you slept during the night. It really doesn’t seem to matter how much you rest, this fatigue keeps you feeling zapped with no energy. It sticks around for afternoon tea and evening prayers.

This week, Winslow Dixon is writing to you about fatigue. Winslow is a published author, freelance writer, and columnist.  She volunteers her time as an advocate for those suffering from chronic illness through the organizations “The UnChargeables” and “Action for Adrenal Awareness.”   She is also a motivational speaker and has dedicated her life to spreading hope to those who are suffering through her non-profit organization, Inspire the Fire Ministry. She blogs at

Come to the blog to read her words. And, oh, tomorrow (April 14) is her birthday. Encourage her by leaving a note in the comments or on her own blog.

Continue reading

Letters to Friends – Where Does it Hurt? What’s the Pain Like?

What’s the Pain Like?

You may be trying to understand what your fibro friend is experiencing. Describing the pain of fibromyalgia is difficult. The asnwer to “What’s the pain like?” is undescribable. It is unlike anything I have known. This isn’t your typical headache or even a broken bone. My pain is like a ghost. You don’t see it and at times I don’t feel it. But if you were to only softly tap my arm or give me a hug, I would have a very sharp pain that would endure long after you stopped touching me. This pain can move around your body and comes and goes without warning.

In today’s Letter to Friends, Selina Huffman writes about her pain. While it’s not the same for everyone, maybe this will give you an idea of what we are feeling. Continue reading